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Lame Animal Totem: Skunked Dog

This month’s lame animal totem is the Skunked Dog. This is a unique animal, a phenomenon that occurs when two ordinary totems, Skunk and Dog, meet and form an altogether different spirit animal. The Skunked Dog represents flagrantly self-destructive stupidity, intrusiveness, and the inability to imagine the consequences of reckless behavior. Its energy is morose, whiny, unrepentant, and disgusting.

When a Skunked Dog enters your life, it is a sign that you should close all your doors and windows. THIS IS NOT A METAPHOR. CLOSE THE DOORS AND WINDOWS. The aroma of the Skunked Dog will pervade any area that [...]

How to Deal with Your Darkest Secrets

As a registered nurse, Jamie often finds herself keeping other people’s secrets. Most of the time, this doesn’t bother her; she empathizes with patients who conceal a scary diagnosis. But recently, Jamie found herself holding a couple of secrets that didn’t rest so easily.

Both came from her coworkers. When a nurse named Esther bungled some paperwork, she confessed to Jamie that she was dyslexic. The other secret was much more upsetting: Susan, a hospital secretary, told Jamie that a popular surgeon (I’ll call him Dr. McCreepy) had been pursuing her sexually. He’d done outrageous things, like asking Susan to [...]

Doing Nothing

Yesterday I went whale-watching with my son Adam and my partner Karen. It was a beautiful day, and there were humpbacks everywhere. Aside from the slight injuries I sustained being elbowed by other tourists, it was awesome.

Of course Adam had his own odd way of whale-watching, which consisted of sitting on the boat with his eyes closed for three hours. Whenever I asked him something (“Don’t you want to see the whales?” “Don’t you want some water?” “Don’t you want to elbow a tourist?”) he’d shake his head briskly, wide awake. When I asked him what he was doing, [...]

Lame Animal Totem: Chicken

Chicken energy comes to teach you how to scratch more, obsess about your position in social hierarchies, fight for dirt-encrusted corn kernels, and die young. If you encounter Chicken in your daily life, you should probably be taking growth hormones. Then Chicken will teach you to fight for dominance when alarmed, and spend the rest of your time brooding. People whose totem is the Chicken should expect to have their creations stolen from them on a regular basis.

Periodically I’ll be sharing the animal totems you wish you knew more about: the marginalized, the disrespected, nay I say, the lame. [...]

Stop Regretting Decisions

So here’s the story: After a lifetime of hand-copying ancient texts, an elderly monk became abbot of his monastery. Realizing that for centuries his order had been making copies of copies, he decided to examine some of the monastery’s original documents. Days later, the other monks found him in the cellar, weeping over a crumbling manuscript and moaning, “It says ‘celebrate,’ not ‘celibate!'”

Ah, regret. The forehead-slap of hindsight, the woeful fuel of country ballads, the self-recrimination I feel for eating a quart of pudding in a crafty but unsuccessful attempt to avoid writing this column. If you’ve ever made [...]

Joy to the Boy

PEOPLE, IT’S TIME TO SET MEN FREE!

I started my career back in the 90s writing about the way social change was tearing women apart. Twenty years later, I think women have made huge strides toward an altogether new way of viewing themselves and moving through the world. Our wonderful tribe of coaches is made up almost entirely of women who have found ways to be true to themselves no matter what society tells them.

Now, it’s time for our boys.

Even when I was researching the crisis of role stress for women, I could see what was coming for men: while [...]

Martha’s blog

Lame Animal Totem: Skunked Dog

How to Deal with Your Darkest Secrets

Doing Nothing

Lame Animal Totem: Chicken

Stop Regretting Decisions

Joy to the Boy

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